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13 Years ago, I Married My Friend

Exactly one decade and 3 years ago, March 20 fell on a Saturday and it was a life-defining day for me. I can’t say I remember waking up that day or getting to the church building. In fact, some parts are as blurry as others are vivid.

I remember being dressed in a tuxedo by around 10 AM and then praying for noon to hurry up. I wasn’t nervous in the least. I had full confidence I was making the right decision. Before we ever went on a date or kissed or got engaged or did anything remotely romantic, I had asked God to show me which girl he had picked as my wife. As scary as it was in the moment, God honored that and told me. Now our wedding day had come and we would be fully together (not going to lie, I was excited about that).

Just one month and a day of being 20 years old, I was taking a step that I didn’t take lightly but still didn’t absolutely comprehend. For one, we had picked the date because we were in college with spring break the following week, we could take our honeymoon. For two, summer weddings are great, but we wanted an unconventional time because we’ve always been a little different.

The time drew near and the seconds couldn’t tick fast enough. I watched candle lighters, flower girls, a ring bearer, parents, grandparents, bridesmaids–the line seemed endless. When the song we had picked for her bridal procession came over the speakers, I felt some sense of relief.

“This is it…”

When the time came for the doors to open and she appeared looking amazingly beautiful and perfectly poised, I couldn’t have removed my smile if someone had offered me $10 million in cash. With every step, I felt the lump in my throat growing bigger and couldn’t help being filled with more than a little wonder, thinking, “she’s coming to me.

Honestly, in so many ways, I still feel that way. I’m blown away at her love, commitment, character, and strength. The way she supports and builds me up, offers tremendous wisdom and insight, demonstrates compassion and caring–I can’t help but be thankful. She is a strong woman of God who will both stand up for what she believes is right and follow my lead as well.

At 20 years old, I was pretty sure I had entered adult manhood (or close), but I know now I had a lot to learn about what it means to be a good husband and a better Christian (still do).  She has helped me in these years become the man that God destined for me to be and we’ll continue to walk this out together until His best is revealed in both of us.

That day I looked in awe at her, I didn’t know the stupid fights we would have. I didn’t know all the struggles we would endure together. I didn’t know how things would try to crush our dreams and break our hearts. I also didn’t know how much joy we would experience; how incredible our kids would be; how amazing it is to watch our friendship and relationship deepen.

I remember our wedding invitations that looked much like this one,

This day I will marry my friend; the one I laugh with, live for, dream with, Love

I’m still married to my best friend and I may not be as disciplined about it as I should, but today I get to take a moment to celebrate her and our life together.

Andrea, I still love to laugh with you,

live for seeing God’s best in and through us,

dream impossible dreams with you,

and I most definitely love you–

more today than anything I could have comprehended 13 years ago

I know our next years will provide more challenges but greater joy

I don’t take what we have for granted

And I am still blown away that you picked me

22 Comments

  1. Congratulations! Thank you for the faithfulness and love you share for each other as you journey as one in a life devoted to the Lord.
    Dusty Rayburn recently posted..The Memory of FaithMy Profile

    • Thanks Dusty. 🙂

  2. Congratulations Jason!
    Jsaon Vana recently posted..Covering a Multitude of SinMy Profile

    • Thank you, Jason!

  3. Congratulations Jason! You wrote a beautiful and touching tribute to your wife.

    Much like you, my wife and I wanted an unconventional wedding date, so we got married in early January (complete with ice and snow and delayed flights).

    • We got married in Oklahoma so we thought ‘great, spring--everyone will be fine traveling.’ Then the week before our wedding there was a freak snow storm and it worried us quite a bit! It was only there for a day or so though, but we’ll never forget that panic. 🙂 Thanks Thomas.

  4. Congrats you guys ! The best marriages have been the ones where the groom would take time to spend with the father to find out who the right person is. You guys are a great example of what the Father had in mind when he said to be fruitful and multiply in Genesis with the adoption of Mizuki and your other children.
    andrew singh recently posted..Christmas-Winterland Photo ExtravaganzaMy Profile

    • Thanks Andrew. And yeah, we’re way up North multiplying the Kingdom! It’s a wonderful life. 🙂

  5. Congratulations! I’ve heard that boxing gloves can often make a marriage more exciting, but that they are used less often after ten years. 🙂
    Ed recently posted..The Student Who Scored 0% On His ExamMy Profile

    • Ha! Yeah, I guess so, Ed! We have never used boxing gloves, but we’ve had our share of fights. Better to keep everything out in the open for sure so the enemy can’t use anything against us. Thank you sir!

  6. Congrats to both of you guys. However, you are still spring chickens. 🙂 May God bless you with many more.
    bill (cycleguy) recently posted..HonestyMy Profile

    • Who you calling a chicken, Bill?! 🙂 Thank you so much. We receive the blessing!

  7. Awesome tribute to God and your wife. Your are indeed blessed my brother!
    floyd recently posted..…AND JUSTICE FOR ALL…My Profile

    • Absolutely. No arguing with that! Thank you, Floyd.

  8. Happy Anniversary! I loved this post and tribute to your beautiful wife and mother of your children. My husband was 20 and I was 18. December 1, 1949 do the math and you will get 62 years. Yes, just the two of us and we live peacfully. Yes, we had disagreements (not fights) and struggles (plenty), but like you we keep Jesus as the Head of our Household and he rules gracefully here.

    P.S. I love your box to check that I am not a spammer. If one can hate -- I hate Capchas. 🙂
    Hazel Moon recently posted..Early MemoriesMy Profile

    • Thank you so much, Hazel! Praise God for a great love like yours and your husband’s--shining His light and grace for everyone to see.

      And no, I don’t like the captchas either (drive me crazy). This seems to cut down on the spam without having the added difficulty of the other. Thanks again!

  9. Jason, the way a man talks about his wife tells a lot about himself. Reading this post, we can tell that you are a man of God who loves his family.
    That was really beautiful.
    By the way, happy anniversary to you and your wife!
    Cris Ferreira recently posted..Worshiping God and meaning itMy Profile

    • I appreciate that, Cris. 🙂 Thanks so much!

  10. Congratulations! I hope my future husband will write such beautiful words about me someday!

    • Thank you, T. 🙂

  11. So true… all the way around. Being together can’t always be easy, but placed together by God, it can be part of growth in Him when there are challenges. And such a joy to see the growth continue. The invitation my husband and I chose and sent out was the same one you showed. He was — and 26-1/2 years later is — my dear friend.

    Nice truthful heartfilling sharing from your heart.
    Joanne Norton recently posted..OFF THE ROAD AGAIN!My Profile

    • Amen to all that and congrats on 26+ years--that’s wonderful, Joanne. Thank you so much.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Glynn Young - 13 Years Ago, I Married My Friend, by @br8kthru at Connecting to Impact http://t.co/i5PBQJ0C
  2. Jason Stasyszen - 13 Years ago, I Married My Friend -today on Connecting to Impact http://t.co/l5I6CP8N
  3. Jason Stasyszen - RT @gyoung9751: 13 Years Ago, I Married My Friend, by @br8kthru at Connecting to Impact http://t.co/FyUI0zIl <<thanks Glynn!
  4. Jason Stasyszen - New Blog Post: 13 Years ago, I Married My Friend http://t.co/iTl5pnDB

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