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5 Things I Don’t Get: Field Trip Edition

This seems like as good point as any to bring you another rousing edition of 5 Things I Don’t Get. It’s simply a moment for both me and you to unburden ourselves of the things that make no sense to us, drive us crazy, and/or make us scratch our heads in befuddled wonder (if you’re interested in more of these, click here if you dare). Plus it’s just good to have a good chuckle every now and again (and if you can’t laugh at the word “chuckles” then you are made of stone, my friend).

As always, I like to point out my Biblical basis for this: Proverbs 30:18-19. You can’t argue with the Good Book!

This time I’m sharing some things I overheard this week while on a beach field trip with my kids. The wisdom, insights, and questions of these 8-year-old’s was nothing short of flabbergastingly (made-up word alert!) amazing. I hope you enjoy…

  1. “This is the last year I’ll be 8.” This girl was completely serious and a little melancholy about the whole prospect. I even tried to explain that every year we only get just the one year, but it was fruitless. She was determined to mourn her misspent youth so who was I to take that away?
  2. “They’re called sasquatches because they squat a lot & give you really mean looks.” As far as I can tell, if you get a couple of 8-year-old boys together, eventually the conversation must turn to Big Foot. I believe it’s in the by-laws or little boys’ handbook or something. I nearly laughed out loud when this boy (as serious as can be) proclaimed this to the amazement of my son. Ah, to be that young and know it all again, I do miss those days.
  3. “Some sea slugs are blood-sucking.” Even though I believe this kid was thinking of leaches, I still found myself being careful around these critters. The only problem is that “some” of them are blood-suckers so how to tell which ones? I figured it’s probably the sparkly ones with perpetually sullen expressions (see here if you’re lost).
  4. “I hate blood-sucking.” A little girl proclaimed this immediately after the previous statement. Other than those sparkly vampires, I’m not sure I know anyone who’s really pro-blood-sucking, but hooray for her for standing up for her beliefs. Honestly, I wish any one of the presidential candidates had the guts to make this their campaign slogan this year.
  5. “Is that crab real?”  To be fair, I believe she was asking, “Is that crab alive?” But it was still quite funny to me. Why? I pictured some misguided ne’er-do-well coming to this semi-remote Alaskan beach and spreading fake crabs around to confuse people maybe? Or to trick them? I don’t know why he did it, but he’s wearing a mask and a black-and-white striped shirt like those oldtimey robbers.

Your turn! What’s your favorite little kid-ism that you’ve heard–either personally or secondhand? Can you help me make better sense of any of these?

22 Comments

  1. Too busy chuckling to add to this.
    Dusty Rayburn recently posted..Do We Have Enough Confidence?My Profile

    • I’ll allow it. :) Thanks Dusty!

  2. You made me actually chuckle when you said, “chuckles.”

    I love when I work with 8 year-olds through teaching a Sunday school class, or through Junior Achievement sessions, or with my own daughter. Just this morning I was teaching a second grade class for JA and we were talking about government. I attempted to relate that to the upcoming elections and asked what happens in November. Most kids answered with the election, but one girl informed that her birthday is in November.

    The things kids say!
    Thomas Mason recently posted..Choosing the Path to ForgivenessMy Profile

    • Ha! Yeah, I can see how her birthday would be more important to her than an election! Thanks Thomas.

  3. Becky (my 9 year old) always has us rolling with her comments but her best one to date was…

    “It’s like a hotdog on a stick but without the hotdog or the stick!”

    She was describing….a Klondike bar!
    Jay Cookingham recently posted..Choosing the Path – Guest BloggingMy Profile

    • I love it! They just say whatever pops into their little heads. Thanks Jay!

  4. Is it sad that I, as a single, 31 year old guy, knew exactly what you were referring to when you wrote: “I figured it’s probably the sparkly ones with perpetually sullen expressions”? Yea, I figured it was. lol
    Jason Vana recently posted..Developing our StrengthsMy Profile

    • In all of our defense, unless we choose an Amish lifestyle, it is very hard to avoid the whole Twilight phenomenon. I definitely give you a pass there, Jason! :)

      • Well I, for one, had NO IDEA what you were talking about until I read the next section, because I refused to click! :-p
        Helen recently posted..BunBun SharesMy Profile

        • Oh come on, Helen! Ha!

  5. Well, I taught second grade in a Catholic School for many years. Every year I would make them write The Christmas Story in their own words. Then I’d bring them home to read, and my mother and I would laugh until our sides hurt… Over and over children are writing “Mary was there” like it was some sort of coincidence!
    Helen recently posted..BunBun SharesMy Profile

    • Oh yeah, kids telling stories is the best! I’m amazed how my kids remember things out of order or with details that weren’t there. It makes me wonder if half the stuff in my childhood really happened or not (or did it happen the way I remember it?). Too funny. Thanks Helen!

  6. My favorite is explaning to them things that aren’t that old but seems old to them. Especially when they see our early 90’s high top nikes and air pumps lol but in reality its okay to show and teach them things of the old. I’ll never forget the time when we where still in New York. Our worship leaders and team was at a conference or something like that. So our Pastor got out the old hymn books and we sang them. And l Learned what a reech was lol (Amazing Grace)
    andrew singh recently posted..Christmas-Winterland Photo ExtravaganzaMy Profile

    • Hymns are awesome, but air pumps? Can’t say the same there. :) Some things are timeless. Our fashion choices in younger years seem crazy to kids now, but back then we were so cool! Ha! Thanks Andrew.

  7. I still talk about Big Foot at least once a day

    • So that’s what keeps you young. Those guys on the searching for Big Foot show are practically infants, I guess. :)

  8. “I hate blood-sucking.”

    I can relate to this. I know some big companies will suck the life out of their employees then spit them out.

    Why even some Christians have been found to do that in the absense of true unity…..

    • It just got heavy in here, but I definitely know what you mean, Ed. :)

  9. So in Sunday school a few months back I had read that weeks memory verse then asked the children…”do you know why this is so important?” to which my little nephew answered very matter a fact as if to ask “don’t ya know?” --“cause it’s in the Bible!”

    • Ha! That’s great. Kids have all the answers. :) Thanks Jess.