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Why “Don’t Be Immature” Never Works

making-facesYou’ve likely heard it, had the phrase said to you, or used it yourself. Seems like solid advice, “Don’t be so immature!”

Granted what many people mean to say is that you’re acting immature, but if you could just change someone’s state of being by simple command, you’d be on to something big–and the best life coach ever!

In reality, you can’t change someone else or yourself by commanding. There is a process to maturity that involves a lot of factors–things like environment, education, opportunities, relationships, traumas, hardships, challenges, etc. A five year old no matter how much he wants it cannot turn himself into a sixteen year old who can drive overnight.

You know this, but it doesn’t stop us from being irritated or depressed about where we are in the maturity process.

You can see destiny and taste it. You know there has to be maturity so you do everything you can to hurry it along, and still you find yourself waiting. At least you’re in good company.

Jesus matured in God’s perfect timing, preparing for the astonishing destiny His Father had for Him. Jesus did not strive to become better. He knew His Father was already pleased with Him. Instead, He trusted His Father. That’s the path we should emulate… –The Cure

Jesus never had to heal one sick person, feed one multitude, or preach one sermon before His Father was pleased with Him. He trusted that God knew exactly what He was doing and accepted His plan and timing. Maturity was not Jesus’ concern, His Father was.

You don’t have to–and in fact, you can’t–earn the Father’s pleasure by being good enough or doing enough. He’s already pleased with you and you have to accept it. He wants you to step into your destiny because He loves all those who haven’t experienced that love yet, but He allows the process to unfold and heals you to walk in that destiny.

What does that produce in you?

We’re no longer in a hurry. For one thing, our dreams are being clarified as our sin is being resolved, our wounds are being healed, and we are in the process of maturing. Our lives are no longer about proving our worth to others through what we get to do. We know He cares even more about our destiny than we do. –The Cure

What a beautiful and complete wholeness the Father longs to bring us into! Destiny and the expression of those things you were made for is not about proving worth or gaining respect or leaving a legacy. It’s the joy of getting to know God who turns you loose to do world-changing stuff.

He cares about your destiny because He profoundly and deeply (yes, even furiously) loves you. Identity and destiny is not in the doing but in knowing your God who allows you to begin to know who He created you to be.

Does that excite you like it does me? Do you ever feel like destiny/maturity is taking too long? What do you do in that situation?


cure2Welcome to week 2 of Chapter 7 and our final discussion of The Cure (disclosure) by John Lynch, Bruce McNicol, and Bill Thrall. We are taking a sentence, paragraph, or passage that inspires, encourages, or challenges and writing about it. Once again, we’ll be taking 2 weeks per chapter as these are dense and thought-provoking words. If you have a response on your blog, add the link to the widget below. Either way, head over to my friend and co-facilitator, Sarah Salter’s blog for her thoughts.

Whether you’ve read the chapter or not, please dive into the conversation!

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10 Comments

  1. Telling people to stop being so immature ASSUMES we are. I know there are those who would beg to differ.
    Bill (cycelguy) recently posted..ThanksgivingStuffMy Profile

    • Ha! That’s true, Bill. Thank you. 🙂

  2. I definitely have room to mature, and I wonder how often God holds his head in his hands over my immaturity.

    I know the maturity I need has to come from Him and He is deeply invested in bringing that maturity to full fruition in his time.

    • I don’t think He’s hanging His head over you or me (even though we do plenty). He knows the process and where He’s taking us. There are certainly bumps in the road, but He knows how to handle them. Thanks so much, Dusty!

  3. Another good thought out post Jason. I love God’s impeccable timing in the maturing time. The courage of God to take 30 years to get His Son ready to take on the sins of the world. That alone encourages me and gives me hope when I find my self being immature. He is more then able to mature us all during different times, through different process, what a wise God we serve. Thanks for sharing God’s wisdom with us.

    • I agree. It’s amazing to think about Jesus, though sinless, still had to mature and grow “in favor with God and man.” He endured every temptation just as we do, and He is the leader in our maturing process. Thanks so much, Betty!

  4. Strange, but I never gave maturity a deep thought. I always figured it was something that came with time. But time does have a way to mature us through the highlights and mistakes in our lives. There’s really nothing we can do to hurry it along, except maybe pray for wisdom.
    Ed recently posted..The Burning Lesson Of FergusonMy Profile

    • Wisdom is a wonderful thing! I think some of us focus on the maturity side of things because of the perceived gains of it, but you’re so right, no hurrying it along. The motivation changes along the way too, I believe. Good thoughts, Ed. Thank you.

  5. While I know I can’t earn God’s love and that He’s answering my prayers has nothing to do with how “good” I am, it’s so easy to slip into a “works” mentality. To think that I must perform in order to gain God’s acceptance and blessings.
    But all I must do is accept His love. He has plenty of it!
    What a mighty and wonderful God we serve!

    • I think it’s easy for all of us to do that at times. The world we live is set up that way and rewards such thinking, but it definitely hinders our walk with Him! His love is such a powerful and beautiful thing. Thanks so much, TC.

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