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I’m Not God (and I’m Sick of Trying)

One good thing about writing a blog is that you can revisit things you’ve written in the past. It can be encouraging or convicting. As I looked back at a post I wrote all the way back in 2008, I was shocked that I still need these words so strongly.

Maybe you need them too.

Does God ever surprise you? I don’t mean a jump-out-of-the-bathroom-and-make-you-wet-your-pants surprise, although if you have a story like that I definitely want to hear it.

The surprise was another revelation of God’s patience and care for me.

Here’s how it went down. The other night I found myself pondering a situation where I thought I had messed up or let everyone down or looked stupid or maybe all of the above. What happened really was not a big deal and more importantly, there was nothing I could do to change it at that point. I’ve written about leaving people-pleasing behind and I think this situation was reflective of this.

I was obsessing about something that had happened in the midst of our service Sunday. I couldn’t seem to stop even though I tried. The more I thought about it and what I could have done differently, I saw myself as a weak and oblivious goober who didn’t know what to do with himself. The more I thought about it, the more I and the situation became a caricature of what had really happened.

It was at this point that God surprised me. I heard Him say clearly, “You be you and I’ll be Me.”

In that moment, my whole perspective changed. I was trying to take the place of God. I thought I could determine what was going on or what impact I was having when nothing could have been further from the truth.

I felt such a freedom after I heard God say that, and it reassured me again that God was not angry, disappointed, or upset at my supposed incompetence. I know I should know it already, but I still struggle with it: all I can be is me.

The cool thing is that He created me and loves what He created. I can be me and not worry about the outcomes and impact as long as I set my heart on obeying Him and His word.

As I read this again, I remembered the situation and how small it made me feel because I had let someone steal my peace and joy. The enemy jumps in the chorus with you and suddenly you don’t know where the blows are coming from.

I’m farther along than I was, but I still struggle with this. Maybe you do too. I want to control outcomes and be “more effective” (although anytime I pursue that, the mark always changes before I reach it).

Take a deep breath and realize with me, “it’s enough for you to be you and let God be God. It’s the only way to live free and He purchased it for us with the precious blood of Jesus.

Have you ever been surprised by God or what He’s spoken to you or showed you? Do you ever struggle with trying to take care of God’s end of things?


Over at Faith Barista, Bonnie Gray is hosting a blog-and-comment discussion of  what God’s revealing to us lately. Go check out all the great posts there.

28 Comments

  1. What a relief it is to realize that we are not the Holy Spirit and we are not God! Nice post and well expounded!!
    Hazel Moon recently posted..Wait until I get you Home !!My Profile

    • Thanks so much, Hazel. It’s such a relief!

  2. I constantly struggle with letting God lead. I am in a situation now where I am being asked by God to be willing to do something I don’t want to do. It doesn’t mean He will require it of me, but He is requiring that I be willing. It’s hard but I know if I chose to let Him take the lead, it will be so very worth it.
    April recently posted..What if He says, “Go”?My Profile

    • I know what you mean. We let experience guide us so much in our lives but when it comes to God we assume all those victories in trusting Him must have been a fluke and this time won’t work. Of course, the enemy is screaming that in our ears so that doesn’t help either. 🙂 Thanks April. Praying great blessings as you trust Him and His leading.

  3. I know I’ve tried to take care of God’s end of things because I was afraid He wouldn’t come through.

    I didn’t want to tell people that God is faithful and then He doesn’t come through and I make Him look bad.

    It’s silly but I’ve tried to save face…for God. Yeah, crazy…but true.
    Tony Alicea recently posted..On Nouns, Verbs And A Writer’s IdentityMy Profile

    • Dude, I totally get it! Don’t feel so crazy, I’ve been there too. Or maybe we’re both crazy. 🙂 Thanks Tony.

  4. I love this. I revisit often the things I’ve written and often post them -- surprised at how relevant they still are in my current situation. This is great and I couldn’t agree more -- I can only be me -- and I need to let God be God. End of story -- freedom? For sure!!
    Cindy Holman recently posted..When Is It MY Turn? Please Pass The Teddy Bear!My Profile

    • It’s worth the time to go back and look for sure. And yeah, love that freedom! Thank you, Cindy.

  5. Yes, I struggle with trying to control things out of my control. He has said “Hand it over to Me”. I have responded “I can’t seem to untangle it from everything else.” He says “Hand it all over, and I’ll untangle it and give you back what is good.” I hand it over, but then find I’ve grasped it back and can’t remember doing it.
    Sometimes I feel like I’m playing hot potato, but I’m grabbing the hot potato then getting rid of it and so on… 🙂
    Helen recently posted..MarriageMy Profile

    • I love that, Helen. It’s a tangled mess and we want to fix it all before we give it to him, but what He can do and in His timing, we may never be able to pull off. What a great picture. Thank you, and yeah, I understand perfectly. 🙂

  6. What a GREAT post. You’re right . . . reflecting on blog posts can be encouraging, convicting, or both. I love how God spoke to you in that moment. I love how He does that. Words that are so powerful that they take your breath away.

    Recently I was praying over a situation, which is overwhelming to say the least, and I simply asked God, after praying for 10 years . . . “Why aren’t you answering my prayer?” His reply, “I AM.”
    In that moment, I gained greater insight into God’s ways. He wasn’t answering my prayers the way I thought He should . . . I’m not God. But He is answering them. I must trust that He knows best. He’s giving me glimpses of the “whys” and I can see His hand at work. I just thank God . . . He’s not me. : )
    Blessings brother,
    Cherie
    Cherie Hill recently posted..Beginning at The End **********NOW on Kindle!**********My Profile

    • I’ve had a similar experience where I told God He had to do something and He said, “I AM.” Reminded that not only is He working, but what I need to focus on is that He is the I AM, the One who is and was and is to come. That’s where my attention has to be. Great thoughts, Cherie! Thank you.

  7. We seem to step so easily, almost without knowing it, into shoes that only He is designed to fill. Thanks for the reminder Jason!
    HisFireFly recently posted..Deeper stillMy Profile

    • Those are certainly big shoes! Thank you, Karin. I appreciate your comment.

  8. I also find it instructive to go back and read things that I wrote awhile back. Sometimes it makes me feel good that I learned the lesson and moved on; other times disappointed that I still haven’t quite got it. But God is faithful to remind us when we need it and to be so, so patient. Thanks for sharing this story; good for me to hear.
    Lisa notes… recently posted..When church leaves you dryMy Profile

    • This one was a little of both for me. I was sad at first that I still deal with it, but then I realized how far I had come by His grace. He is definitely faithful in all things! Thanks so much, Lisa.

  9. Wow, I have that same annoying voice in my head too. It’s great to see the insight you’ve gained from that situation. I’ve learned that Truth is where my feet should be planted- “all other ground is sinking sand”.

    • At the time it sure seemed like sink or swim--either I was going to gain some insight or it was never going to let me go! And yes, yes, yes to that Truth. Thanks Jennifer.

  10. I have oozed gooberness before my friend and also have heard God tell me just who He is…and who I am not (a goober). We’re His sons and daughters and He is our God and Father…something we need reminding on often.

    Thanks for sharing Bro’
    Jay Cookingham recently posted..Random Catch UpMy Profile

    • For some reason oozing gooberness sounds pretty painful. 🙂 Thanks for the encouragement, Jay.

  11. Simple truth that keeps me from trying to be God:

    It’s HIS name, and not mine. If I pray in HIS name, He knows people will be watching to see if the prayer “works” or “fails”. Do you honestly think He will allow His name to be anything but glorified?

    Just sayin’.
    Donald Borsch Jr recently posted..I Will Not__________.My Profile

    • That’s a great point, Donald! Taking responsibility is good, but when it’s not yours to be responsible for it’s a big headache. Thanks man.

  12. Solid stuff Jason.
    Michael recently posted..Even NowMy Profile

    • Thank you, Michael.

  13. Wow, can I relate to this post! Thank you for this timely reminder.
    Kristine McGuire recently posted..Finding Peace in the MomentMy Profile

    • Glad someone besides me needed the reminder. 🙂 Thanks Kristine.

  14. Just this morning, I was praying, “God, I surrender this day to you. Help me to just be me because you’ve got it all covered.”

    I’m always learning to let go, not analyze my days away. A good day for me is when I’m just “living” my day an hour at a time.

    The encouragement you write is classic, Jason. It never gets dated because we are always growing. 😉 So happy to “see” you in the jam, friend!
    Faith Barista Bonnie recently posted..How Ordinary You Holds Extraordinary ValueMy Profile

    • It’s the dreaded ‘analysis paralysis’ and I know it well! It’s good to ‘see’ you here too, Bonnie. 🙂 Thanks so much.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Jason Stasyszen - Today on Connecting to Impact: I’m Not God (and I’m Sick of Trying) http://ow.ly/5z2lq
  2. April McKinnon - RT @br8kthru: I'm Not God (and I'm Sick of Trying) http://t.co/lPJ7MdT
  3. April McKinnon - RT @br8kthru: I'm Not God (and I'm Sick of Trying) http://t.co/lPJ7MdT
  4. Jason Stasyszen - RT @amblessedbeyond: RT @br8kthru: I'm Not God (and I'm Sick of Trying) http://t.co/lPJ7MdT <<thanks so much, April :)
  5. Helenatrandom - RT @br8kthru: I'm Not God (and I'm Sick of Trying) http://t.co/Fqr4EJQ
  6. Jason Stasyszen - RT @helenatrandom: RT @br8kthru: I'm Not God (and I'm Sick of Trying) http://t.co/Fqr4EJQ <<thanks Helen Joy!
  7. Jason Stasyszen - New Blog Post: I’m Not God (and I’m Sick of Trying) http://ow.ly/1dFJ5q
  8. Project Mathetes - New Blog Post: I’m Not God (and I’m Sick of Trying) http://ow.ly/1dFJ5q
  9. Jason Stasyszen - I'm Not God (& I'm Sick of Trying) http://su.pr/3iTzrO Come join the conversation at Connecting to Impact

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